Thursday, November 23, 2006

Pavemant cracks

After thirteen years of almost porn and not-quite paedofile handbooks Pavement magazine is shutting down the presses. According to editor in chief Barney Mac, the move is not because of recent outrage about a 'photo essay' where you can see up the snatch of a ten year old girl and out of her mouth. It is for financial reasons.

"Advertisers are being harder to come by, all the magazines are suffering." Barney was loosely paraphrased as saying. We at IS IT ART don't see Home and Garden going out of business, but then again, we don't see objectionable material gracing their pages. The same goes for all the other fashion magazines.

So gee whizz, Barn. Ads are hard to come by? I wonder why... Maybe companies just don't want to advertise any more. Unlikely.

Fortunately, Pavement has an offspring- Grow Up magazine, which is like Vice magazine for teeny-boppers, if such a demographic exists. Now if you thought Pavement was rubbish, but found the pages to be too glossy to absorb rectal scrapings, then Grow Up might just be what you are looking for.

So what's next for Barney? Will he continue to fill his drawers with candid up-the-skirt-polaroids while wearing ladies undergarments stolen from the washing lines of top execs above the AK skyline? Sadly unavoidably, we will be watching.

Wednesday, November 08, 2006

"Hey, here's an idea- maybe the kids can save our sorry asses..."

Today, for no specific reason IS IT ART went to Kristin private school in Albany AK to see the exhibition by year six students (Who pay $1200 a term for the privelige of education). This years theme? POVERTY. Yes that dirty word made famous by such rich cunts as sir Bob Geldoff and U2 frontman Bongo. Poverty is now it seems, the new AIDS. The very word strikes fear into the heart of any upper middle class ten year old...This was the first to make an impression on us, walking around being followed by a train of young boys who weren't sure if we were real or not. It's of a little boy sweeping up rubbish see? He seems to be sweeping it into his house, but that's ok. If every little boy did that we could probably all retire.
OH THE DUALITY of it all. you can't see them, but I bet those who are with are in their skyscrapers schemeing away, puffing on big cigars just trying to think of ways for those without to live more miserable lives, possibly by making themselves feel really good at the same time...
Even ten year olds know George is a criminal... Somewhere here there is a picture of the space station (that's right folks, there's really one up there) Underneath is a plaque that reads 'America needs to forget about going into space until it has solved all the problems to do with poverty.' Possibly a bit optimistic, but oh well, in another 10-15 years the kid'll be as broken down by the world as any of us. And poor. And living on the moon. In a ghetto.
Keep hold of those sheets of rusted corrugated iron- they'll soon be the only thing between you and the toxic waste lapping at the shore. The shore that you (yes you, dear reader) fucked up in the firstplace. Cunt.
It was quite nice to see kids delving into the worlds miseries with such a positive outlook, and from such a positive and secure establishment. There was not a kid there that didn't have the face of an old person.

Wednesday, November 01, 2006

film review

this is a review of a film that we have yet to see, and probably never will see. The film in question is called "Children of Man". The premise? OK get this: There hasn't been a child born in 20 years due to infertility on the part of the females (this in itself sounds wrong and it would be better if all the men went sterile, which according to the latest studies is about to come true.) Anyhoo, of course the world goes crazy (Not sure why, they can still fuck can't they?) and of course there is an over bearing sence of doom...

But of course it all goes pear shaped when the hero (Clive Owen) discovers a pregnant woman and has to smuggle her thru the chaos to a kind of PETA for humans. This is where the dissappointment comes in. We at IS IT ART would much prefer to see a film whereupon society dealt with the problem they faced instead of the old "Preggers mole, 1inamillion".

We were excited to see this kind of film coming up until we saw the trailer.

The tagline is "No children. No future. No hope."

IS IT ART thinks it should be: "There is no hope...oh wait...there it is."

[from trailer]
Theodore Faron: I can't really remember when I last had any hope, and I certainly can't remember when anyone else did either. Because really, since women stopped being able to have babies, what's left to hope for?

What a fucking dipshit.